Big Tent Fake Quotation Roundup

All the best (and worst) made-up quotations from the last week or so, inspired by the ridiculous Thomas Jefferson non-quotation, "Dissent is the highest form of patriotism." Remember, none of these are real, and all of them are stupid:

"Theft is the highest form of giving."
-Abraham Lincoln

"Mother Earth told me to kill you.'
-Simon Schama

"No man loves his country more than he who speaks out against it."
-Daniel Webster

"Starvation is the highest form of fulfillment."
-Cicero

"To steal from a child is to invest in the future."
-Allen Dulles

"We must burn down all vestiges of the past to build a brighter future."
-Frances Perkins

"Protest is the surest path to progress."
-Patrick Henry

"Revolution is the highest form of coexistence."
-Immanuel Kant

"Only through violent revolution will we ever truly know peace."
-Nicholas Biddle

"Only by plucking out the eyes of our enemies will we ever gain sight."
-Thomas "Tip" O'Neill

"Blind rage is the highest form of peaceful enlightenment."
-Federalist No. 32

"The road to a better future is illuminated only by the intense burning fervor of true believers."
-Aristotle

"Poverty and virtue are one and the same."
-William Jennings Bryan